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I'm Gonna Hire A Wino To Decorate Our Home

In the style of

David Frizzell

Lyrics

i came crawlin' home
last night like many
nights before

i finally made
it to my feet
as she opened
up the door
and she said you're
not gonna do
this anymore

she said i'm gonna
hire a wino to decorate
our home so you'll feel
more at ease here
and you won't
need to roam

we'll take out the
dinin' room table
we'll put a bar along
that wall and a neon sign
will point the way to our
bathroom down the hall

she said just
bring those
friday paychecks
and i'll cash 'em all
right here

and i'll keep on tap
for all your friends
their favorite
kind of beer

and for you
i'll always
keep in stock
those soft
aluminum cans

and when you're
feelin' macho you can
crush 'em like a man

she said we'll rip out
all the carpet and
put sawdust
on the floor

serve hard
boiled eggs
and pretzels
and i won't
cook no more

there'll be monday
night football on t.v.
above the bar and a
pay phone in the hallway
when your friends can't
find their car

she said i'm gonna
hire a wino to decorate
our home so you'll feel
more at ease here
and you won't
need to roam

we'll take out the
dinin' room table
and put a bar along
that wall and
a neon sign
will point the way
to our bathroom
down the hall

she said you'll get
friendly service
and for added
atmosphere

i'll slip on
somethin' sexy
and i'll cut it
clear to here

then you can slap
my bottom
every time you tell
a joke just as long as
you keep tippin' well
i'll laugh until
you're broke

she said instead of
friendly quarrels
we'll have a bar
room brawl

when the ham's bear
says it's closin' time
you won't have
far to crawl

and when you run out
of money you'll have
me to thank

you can sleep
t off next mornin'
while i'm puttin'
it in the bank

she said i'm gonna
hire a wino
to decorate
our home so you'll feel
more at ease here
and you won't
need to roam

then when you and your
friends get off from
work and you have a
powerful thirst
well there won't be
any reason
why you can't
stop off here first

she said i'm gonna
hire a wino to decorate
our home so you'll feel
more at ease here
and you won't
need to roam

we'll take out the
dinin' room table
and put a bar along
that wall and
a neon sign
will point the way
to our bathroom
down the hall

she said i'm gonna
hire a wino to
decorate
our home so you'll feel
more at ease here
and you won't
need to roam

we'll take
out the dinin'
room table and put a
bar along that wall

Details

  • Duration : 4:12
  • Key : C
  • Genre : Country
  • Year released : 1982
  • Language : English

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